Speedy4u55 said:
So how do you tell someone that its not working out for that reason?
A bit reluctant to tell her? Are you reluctant to tell her other things she may not want to hear? That in and of itself needs improvement too or are you talking about how do you tell friends and family? When it's personal just say exactly that.
You have to tell the girlfriend exactly what the problem is, whether you think she knows or not. What you're wanting isn't selfish or irrational and not being happy isn't going to be good for either of you. Just calmly tell her exactly what you told us and make sure she pays attention. Good luck, hope it gets better!!
I don't know you, but I can sympathize totally. I'm in your situation. But now I'm stuck with no way out. I made the mistake of thinking I could fix it and that I was above people's advice to ditch the birch, or maybe I was just scared. Either way I'll spend the rest of my sexless life in regret. Please please please don't be me, ditch her!!!
Speedy4u55 said:
I've been in this relationship for a year and a half and the girl I'm seeing is awesome. Everything is usually good all around but where we have issues is with intimacy. I see it as a problem but she doesn't. I'm a guy and like sex a lot. I'm horny pretty much all the time. Well she's not. The sex is amazing but its very far and few. I don't mind not having sex all the time but I at least like to be pleasured. I'll ask for a hand job and she usually says no. Sometimes she says yes but rarely. She tells me "Go to the bathroom and finish yourself." She says "It's not my responsibility to pleasure you." I think differently I've never had this problem in a relationship. I never used to be as horny as I am now I think partly because I used to be pleasured wherever whenever. She won't just ever touch me in bed. I've asked her too and she states I can't just touch you because you'll just ask me to finish you. One time she did just touch me and I didn't finish just to prove I can be touched and not finish. That didn't do anything. Its so hard to be jerked and not finish and I don't think that's fair. I dono how to talk further about this with her. I get myself off more than I get pleasure. We'll be in bed she'll feel me brush up on her I'll be hard and she won't do anything not even touch me. Please HELP. I'm 27 I've tried talking to her and she sees no problem and says its not her responsibility.
You should always listen to your mother.
Since I do not see any posts here with my opinion , I feel obligated to chime in.
Speaking for myself, I was not prepared for the lack of sex that my marraige has brought. SUCKS, but it is what it is. I wouldn't DREAM of ending my relationship because of it. Too many good things to give up.
But I can definately see where ending it b4 it ever begins sounds like good advice. I'll stay outta that debate. Just decide what you love more , sex or her. Because there are dozens of men here that can agree , if the sex AIN"T good now, there won't be any earthmoving events that are going to change her.
