I have posted in the personals looking for one and not expecting an instant reply or anything.

However I was wondering what other options might be. I've heard some folks suggest something like grindr, but I'm not looking for anything BUT a stroke bud and I think the message might get lost with a hook-up app.

I also don't want to just jump into it, I want to get to know the person before meeting in person.

Any suggestions?

I have found all of my JO buds on xHamster. Make a page and fill it with all of your horniest stuff. Videos of you jacking off and all of your favorite pics and videos. Then look for locals to friend and send them friend requests and nessage them.
There is another site called sniffies. I have found a few potential friends there, but it is a site for mostly gay hook ups. If you just want to jack off to porn with another guy, it probably won't work. But if you want to suck cock and get your cock sucked, you can find plenty of guys willing to do that.