I've always been unhappy with the common system of classifying somebody's sexual orientation, e.g. hetrosexual, bisexual, homosexual. I wouldn't consider myself bisexual, but I also wouldn't consider myself straight either. The term bi-curious doesn't apply to me either because I'm not curious about having a meaningful sexual or emotional relationship with a guy. My homosexual interest extends as far as enjoying the odd j/o session with a friend.

The idea of using a fuzzy set to describe sexuality has been around for ages (probably suggested by Kinsey), but nobody seems to be using it. In my opinion, the concept that 0 represents totally straight (if there is such a thing), and 10 represents totally gay (likewise), is so much better at describing people.

I would rate myself as maybe a 1 or a 2. How would you guys (and girls) rate yourselves and what are your thoughts?

I couldnt agree more! Anyone reading my profile must agree too.......All im looking for is a bud to feel comfortable enough with to put some good porn on, get naked and wank off to it with a bud...how simple is that!....but its real dificult to find guys into this as they either want to go further down the gay senario or couldnt possibly entertain it as its "too gay" for them...i just cant win!
By the way im in the UK too so where are you in the UK bud?

I have to disagree guys. I think straight means guys who like girls, bisexual means guys who like both girls and guys, and homosexual means guys who like guys (and vice versa for females). A lot of people seem to be confused as to what bisexual means...jerking off with a friend does not constitute bisexual!! Have you had sex with your jerkoff bud? Do you have intimate feelings for him or want to have sex with him? Mainly, the answer is no....because most of us want to have relationships (marrk, kids etc) with the opposite sex. If you want to jerk off with a bud and thats it then you are still straight, as ALL straight guys are a bit curious about other males...doesnt make you a bisexual. If that were so...we'd all be bisexual.
Just my two cents, lets keep this discussion going...I want to hear what other guys have to say.

I think the very nature of jerking off with another guy indicates a basic interest in the same sex. It doesn't mean one is gay, but I do believe it means the person is open to human sexuality. Even str8 guys have a basic curiosity about his fellow "man". While watching str8 porn, many guys actually focus on the man rather than the woman. We admire his form, his muscles, and yes his cock. I think we ourselves in the man. We put ourselves in his place.

After reading it reminded me of having seen a segment on tv recently about asexual people. Meaning people who are'nt interested in sexual relations with either sex. It was theorized that there is some chemical in the brain that changes you but it can also be from a group of other outside factors. Everyone naturally labels themselves and other people as this type or person or that type of person. The different orientations gives people something to attach to make sense of others. Something that everyone can easily identify. Here's an analogy. George Carlin, when he was talking about the ten commandments...there is a reason why there is 10. The Top Ten, the ten most wanted, the ten best dressed. The number 10 is something that to everyone makes the most sense to the mind. It's a round figure.

I consider myself straight in that I only have emotional attachments for women and always prefer having sex with women.

But I've also enjoyed sexual activity with jo buds...just for the pure pleasure of the sex. With jo buds, the urge to play with each other's cocks has often been too strong to ignore. We've done hand jobs on each other, dick to dick play (frottage), and have also exchanged blow jobs. So, I'm more than bicurious, having had quite a bit of male sex experience. But, I still think that my preference for and better defines my orientation.

Maybe the sliding scale of 1 to 10 would a way to express it. Certainly, sexual impulses are powerful and varied....and labels are probably inadequate to fully define it. BTW, Orin mentioned that guys may look at the guys in porn videos as much or more than the women. That's true in my case. Seeing the well built guys with big stiff dicks is a turnon for me.

You're in luck!!

I recently went to a conference that had a session surrounding transgender people in the workplace and also about gender and sex specifically. The presenter outlined 4 different scales.

Genetic Sex
Your biological sex (XX-female, XY-male and body parts) Essentially what you're born with.

Gender
Who/what do you think you are? (man or a woman)

Sexual Orientation
Who are you romantically attracted to? The opposite sex, the same sex, or both? (Apply the Straight - Bi - Gay/Lesbian spectrum here)

Presentation/Social Role
How do you present yourself to others? What social role do you assume? (Masculine to Feminine)

It's a new concept in society to be open sexually regarding what turns you on and what you like to do in your private sexual lives.

I've been with a man and I've been with a woman. I'm not romantically attracted to women. I think they're great to look at and are much more asthetically pleasing than men are. However, I am romantically attracted to men. I much more prefer the company of men as opposed to women in general. Masturbation with another female didn't do anything for me. But the idea of it turns me on. I watch girl-girl porn and it's sometimes arousing (if it's not too damn cheesy) but that doesn't make me bi, bi-curious, or a lesbian. Sure, it turns me on but I have no interest in pursuing a romantic relationship with another woman.

I consider myself straight in terms of romantic relationships. And yes, I realize this is the "For Him" section.

"I consider myself straight in that I only have emotional attachments for women and always prefer having sex with women.But I've also enjoyed sexual activity with jo buds...just for the pure pleasure of the sex. With jo buds, the urge to play with each other's cocks has often been too strong to ignore. We've done hand jobs on each other, dick to dick play (frottage), and have also exchanged blow jobs."

This is the part I never get. Call me close minded but I don't see how you can identify yourself as straight and still basically "be" with a guy the way you are describing. Even when you just have feelings towards women saying you are straight I would think you are still acting on a physical desire that is'nt straight. Whenever I have read anything I consider the source of who it's coming from. You are 20 and still at the point of finding yourself probalby to come to the realization one day that you are really bisexual. Like you said you are more than bicurious.

I think (in addition to all the factors mentioned above) it depends on how horny you are. If you're really horny you'll go after anything or anyone.

That's the opposite of the asexual people mentioned above. I think it has something to do with the balance of chemicals in the brain. There is a wide variation.

But what I don't get is: why did the prudes and asexual people come up with the rules? Probably *because* they don't have the urge and don't understand those who do.

They want rules and strict areas to put people in because it makes them feel better, just like how Str8Male74 has this need to label everyone around him. It makes him feel in control and safe. And if you don't fit his definition of orientations, then you're automatically NOT straight.

It's funny hearing that from a man who goes into the chatroom and only wants to chat privately with straight men in a masturbation chatroom. I've never once seen him ask to chat with women. To me, that's not exactly straight behavior either.

This is an interesting topic that I thought would see more appropriate exposure on the Sex and Relationships board.

Moved

It's alright for other people to judge me for my actions in the chat room for those who all they get is what happens in there. A public perception. I knew you were probably going to say something Anna. Frankly, you and nobody else really knows me. And I am not interested in making this a war of words. I could comment on being married and having threesomes but I don't get into it because I also don't know you. It's your business. I should be treated with the same respect and not have my opinions attacked every time it is contrary to your belief system. The point I am making is everyone comes from emigating circumstances unbeknownst to everyone else unless you wanna get into talking about life stories, but having your life be an open book to everyone does'nt feel right either. There is a real reason why it appears I just talk to the guys which does'nt have much to do with sexual orientation.

Just giving examples of straight people acting not straight. That's something I don't get. That's all.

And like you said, people come from emigating circumstances unbeknownst to everyone else so how can you even begin to understand their orientation or their behaviors? Just be sexual in whichever way pleases you best. That's all.

I agree with that one. I'm pretty much on the straight side of things, however I really get turned on when I see a guy cum. When I watch porns, I'll usually watch the first part of it and then skip to the part where they guy blows his load either on the girl's face or my favorite, on her stomach or back. When I cam with another dude, I can't cum until the other guy cums first. In fact the only thing that keeps me going when I jerk off with another guy is knowing that he is going to cum. Other than that, I usually have some porn (straight) going while I'm jerkin with another guy until he tells me he's going to cum. Not too sure where that puts me on the spectrum lol.

The sliding scale that Barefoot mentions matches my undertanding of sexual orientatiopn, remembering that where you see yourself on it may vary from time to time in your life-- dependant on age, stage in relationships, health, and personal situation, etc. It's a real pity that more poeple don't see it that way. However, I think that many who rail against understanding, or appear to, may do so because they wish to hide, even possibly from themselves, what they know to be true. I think it is important that no one feel ashamed of their orientation, be it straight, bi, gay or whatever other word. As long as what you are doing feels good, and is mutual and not doing anyone any harm...it just has to be better than hate.