Mine would tell me to play with it more and longer. I beat him to cum fast coz I can't savor the moment, I get so horned up near splooge. He'd tell me stop going nofap for weeks at a time coz I think it's healthy. Sometimes I wonder if he'll just pack up his shit and leave. He'd tell me thanks for all the supplements that keep him rock hard and for all the man creams that keep him handsome and healthy. He'd tell me to share the attention I give my balls, coz I just can't help but pay them a visit practically all the time. Love sitting with 'em in my grasp. He'd tell me my hand spooning him when I drift off to sleep makes a nice flesh blanket. He's my pacifier. If your cock could talk, would he be happy with you or would you have some explaining to do?

I think mine would have words with my face for being decidedly on the ugly side, so preventing it from having all the pussy it would have liked.

For fuck sake man, get me some fucking pussy!!!

PUt me in your fleshlight...I need to squirt

This afternoon 'Thanks', and 'Liked that line you used, "Naked, some men walk like penguins".

she would say to me "you've got a lovely touch"!

How about something different than that hand of yours dude?

pleaseee... not everyday.. im tired

ya dirty fuckin bastard ya

mine would say ... "cum on"

Wank me, wank me, WANK ME!

Let's play! and play and play

"I'm pretty sure your bi dude. You fucking jerk off to everything!"

Can you give me a hand bud?